Not a lot to say tonight. Sure there's been plenty on my mind, but not really much I want to talk about. I still tell my friends some of what I've been thinking of. For me it's always been easier to talk about what I'm feeling then to just harbor it inside. Except that lately I've been pondering things that I'm not sharing even with my closest friends. The thoughts crowding my brain aren't exactly life changing or anything. It's just very out of the ordinary for me not to share things with Christine or Alan. Well, I most definitely do not tell them everything. But the small mundane things to problems I need help with I spill to them. It almost worries me that I'm not going to them about this stuff. I feel like I'm starting to close myself off from everyone, from everything, and that it's starting with them, two of the last people I would ever want to be out of my life. If I was closing myself off they would be the final ones to go, not the first. I don't even know. I'm just confused I guess. In all aspects. Life, love, school, friends, family, work. Nothing is really going right. Life is spinning out of control. Love is not a large part in my life (read non-exsistent), high school is overrated, friends are full of stupid drama, family has always been trouble and work does not pay me enough to stand on concrete covered carpet for six hours a day.
9.27.2009
Mmm.
Not a lot to say tonight. Sure there's been plenty on my mind, but not really much I want to talk about. I still tell my friends some of what I've been thinking of. For me it's always been easier to talk about what I'm feeling then to just harbor it inside. Except that lately I've been pondering things that I'm not sharing even with my closest friends. The thoughts crowding my brain aren't exactly life changing or anything. It's just very out of the ordinary for me not to share things with Christine or Alan. Well, I most definitely do not tell them everything. But the small mundane things to problems I need help with I spill to them. It almost worries me that I'm not going to them about this stuff. I feel like I'm starting to close myself off from everyone, from everything, and that it's starting with them, two of the last people I would ever want to be out of my life. If I was closing myself off they would be the final ones to go, not the first. I don't even know. I'm just confused I guess. In all aspects. Life, love, school, friends, family, work. Nothing is really going right. Life is spinning out of control. Love is not a large part in my life (read non-exsistent), high school is overrated, friends are full of stupid drama, family has always been trouble and work does not pay me enough to stand on concrete covered carpet for six hours a day.
