Well it's been about two and a half months since my last post. Not really sure why I stopped writing. I think my posts just got pretty repetitive or whatever. But now I have so much more on my mind then some dumb guy I used to like and never talk to anymore. Well for one, I've been a lot happier then I was before. Pretty sure it's not a coincidence that once I learned to not form attachments to people as easily my stress dissolved. My mistake was that I kept giving everyone the benefit of the doubt no matter how often they let me down in the past. Another thing is I've been trying to re-invent myself in a way. I'm not letting anyone tell me how to live my own life. I'll do what I want, within reason, and make my own mistakes in life. I understand that you may know more about a subject then I do but if you don't let me then I'll never be able to learn for myself. All i want to do at the moment is do what makes me happy and have a good time with life on my own. I don't need a boyfriend to have a whole and content life. I have my friends who are boys and I have my friends who are girls. If someone else comes along and fits in nicely then more power to them. But at the moment I'm not out looking for something extra in my life. People go in and out of my life all the time. It may suck at times and I'd rather no one went out but rather come in closer. Only there is nothing I can do about other people's lives. If I mess up you can leave for as long as you want, I'll be here when you come back, if you choose to, just don't expect me to follow you. This may sound hypocritical compared to how I've been in the past. But the past is just that, the past. It's behind me. Gone for good. No use chasing after something I can't catch. That's kind of the reason I want to change the path ahead of me. It's the one thing I will always have control over even if everything else around me is falling apart.
7.06.2009
It's Been Awhile...
Well it's been about two and a half months since my last post. Not really sure why I stopped writing. I think my posts just got pretty repetitive or whatever. But now I have so much more on my mind then some dumb guy I used to like and never talk to anymore. Well for one, I've been a lot happier then I was before. Pretty sure it's not a coincidence that once I learned to not form attachments to people as easily my stress dissolved. My mistake was that I kept giving everyone the benefit of the doubt no matter how often they let me down in the past. Another thing is I've been trying to re-invent myself in a way. I'm not letting anyone tell me how to live my own life. I'll do what I want, within reason, and make my own mistakes in life. I understand that you may know more about a subject then I do but if you don't let me then I'll never be able to learn for myself. All i want to do at the moment is do what makes me happy and have a good time with life on my own. I don't need a boyfriend to have a whole and content life. I have my friends who are boys and I have my friends who are girls. If someone else comes along and fits in nicely then more power to them. But at the moment I'm not out looking for something extra in my life. People go in and out of my life all the time. It may suck at times and I'd rather no one went out but rather come in closer. Only there is nothing I can do about other people's lives. If I mess up you can leave for as long as you want, I'll be here when you come back, if you choose to, just don't expect me to follow you. This may sound hypocritical compared to how I've been in the past. But the past is just that, the past. It's behind me. Gone for good. No use chasing after something I can't catch. That's kind of the reason I want to change the path ahead of me. It's the one thing I will always have control over even if everything else around me is falling apart.
